8 Products We Use on our Bodies, and the Alternative!

Shampoo.
Dirty hair. Bald head.

Razor.
Bearded men. Hairy legged women. Furry edged bikinis.

Face cream.
Wrinkly faced thirty year olds.

Nail varnish.
Dirty nails, exposed! Beige hands.

Deodorant.
Smelly people. Stinky tubes and buses. Pheronome fuelled love affairs.

After Shave.
Stinking men’s sheets that (you now realise) haven’t been washed for months.(Ditto, underwear!)

Perfume.
Women who can’t pretend they never suffer with flatulence.

Make up.
Plain or unattractive models, film and pop stars. Raised self esteem for ordinary women.

More ideas welcome!

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