image : http://www.inmagine.com/pdre038/pdre038251-photo

Looming out at us everywhere is sinister shiny stuff, mounds of manicured foodstuffs and piles of puffed packaged presents. The only way to avoid Christmas before December is to do all the following:

Don’t watch television

Don’t open junk mail

Don’t answer your door

Don’t visit anybody

Don’t go shopping

Don’t go out of your front door

Don’t use the internet

Turn your radio off

Avoid street surveys and sellers

Wear an ‘I hate Christmas’ T-Shirt

Wear disgusting perfume so nobody comes close

Wear blinkers

Go into hospital

Take a holiday to an Eastern Country

Go to a health farm

Become an inmate of the ‘Big Brother’ house

Commit a crime, so you get sent to prison

Join a tree saving protest and live up one for a few weeks

Become a Jehovah’s Witness and carry the ‘Watchtower’ magazine around with you

Hang an effigy of Santa hanging from a noose in your car and outside your front door